Gongol.com Archives: May 2005
Brian Gongol

We All Need a Little Humor (5.18.2005)
Drug Safety Duck

News (5.18.2005)
"No" Polling Ahead in French EU Referendum
It's unclear what that would mean for the British referendum on the EU Constitution. Blair might just be trying to wait long enough for it all to go away.

Threats to Western Civilization (5.18.2005)
Tear Gas Attack on London Subway
Related: A hand grenade thrown near President Bush during his trip to Georgia, originally thought harmless, turns out to have been a real attack that simply malfunctioned. Still no word on the grenade attack on the British Consulate in New York City, two weeks later. This is called "pattern recognition."

The United States of America (5.18.2005)
The UN Irony
The Universal Declaration of Human Rights says:
Article 19.
Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers.
That doesn't seem to keep China from being a permanent member of the Security Council, despite its ongoing restrictions on press freedom, nor does it keep Egypt from having a seat on the Human Rights Committee, despite its roundly-criticized official record on human rights. It's not that the UN itself is a bad idea, but that it's incredibly difficult to take seriously with such internal contradictions.

Broadcasting (5.18.2005)
"24" Exhaustively Examined
The Fox series is heavy on action and well-enough acted, but the writing leaves something to be desired. A Salon review notes that it's about as far-fetched as our brains can handle.

Business and Finance (5.18.2005)
What Is It You Do, Again?
An "About Us" page from a website that doesn't say anything at all (company name changed to protect the innocent):
About "Acme, Inc."

Company History
Since 1981, "Acme, Inc." has successfully designed and implemented numerous projects for commercial, industrial, and governmental clients throughout North America and abroad. Over the years, its success and growth can be attributed to flexibility, strong business partner alliances, and an extensive knowledge base. These attributes enable "Acme, Inc." to execute virtually any project on time and within budget constraints. "Acme, Inc."'s organization is uniquely structured to provide experienced individuals with the tools necessary to meet the demands of its clients. With a staff of over 160 information technology and engineering professionals in offices throughout the U.S., "Acme, Inc." is able to serve the needs of its clients anywhere in the U.S.

"Acme, Inc." is committed to maintaining the highest standards through a strong company-wide work ethic and its dedication to quality. The company adheres to these standards through taking great pride in providing quality engineering, technical, and professional services for all types of projects. With a team of highly skilled professionals and technology experts, "Acme, Inc." is capable of providing both turnkey and specialized solutions in a variety of areas.
It's hard to believe that so many words can come together to mean absolutely nothing. The reader can't tell whether these "services" are for designing non-slip flooring or nuclear power plants. Try again.