Brian Gongol

Up to 100,000 say they want full democracy back

They've been warring on and off for 14 years; now's as good a time as any to knock it off

Did the surprise-visit-to-Iraq thing, and good for him

Seriously, world, we ain't kidding

This one was 54th on the list; the vast majority have been detained

Better to be feared than loved? Sometimes it's hard to tell.

Even though it's one of the most effective radical weight-reduction strategies out there; tell that to those "single-payer" health-care advocates

ISM index at a 20-year high

Russians, other natural gas suppliers say Belarus is a bad payer and gets the boot; I'm guessing it gets cold there

At 150,000 tons, it's the largest cruise ship in the world

They're running big budget deficits, and the European Union has rules against that

Estimates of 1 trillion computerized, networked objects within ten years

Private industry is already putting the poor in contact with the Internet; the "digital divide" heals itself when people are allowed to pursue profits

And the leading subject is Viagra

Google's "top hits" of 2003 include Britney Spears, Harry Potter, other nonsense

$250,000 if you turn them in; it hit a record one of every 12 emails being sent yesterday

The software that starts your computer could be up for replacement. Or not.

I've gotten six versions this morning; it also "spoofs" email addresses, using fake return addresses from other domains

Says he has the solution to ending all those stupid unsolicited emails

Will be "something only old people have"

That guy sitting next to you might be packing heat

French pilots' union calls sky marshals "cowboys" as if that's a bad thing

I haven't priced missile launchers lately, but I'll bet they cost less than the expected $1 million per plane that the defense systems will

Plane to hold four times its weight in fuel

Terrorists have an unhealthy obsession with our system of air travel

148 killed; no definite cause yet

Sorry, kids, this isn't the time to start getting haughty with us

Howard Dean should take his latte-drinking, Volvo-driving, body-piercing left-wing freak show back to Vermont

Warning to packrats everywhere

Innocent parody? Outright blashpemy? You decide. It's still funny.

Give repeat offenders embarrassing license plates and see who keeps up bad behavior

Was caught selling pot at the Cabrini-Green housing projects

Read the whole week of strips for the full effect

Will add ten new members in that time; too bad the colorful Berlusconi's out

Medical examiner says October fire was intentional

Rejects humanitarian relief mission proposed by Sen. Elizabeth Dole. Almost forgot she was a Senator, didn't you?

More than 100,000 already live in Israel

Religious reconciliation concert attracts Christian, Jewish, Muslim leaders

Among other things, you won't be getting any more cattle intestines or adult cow brains anymore

Rocks look layered, indicating there's a chance water was once there

Looks like everything's working right with the lander; its twin will arrive shortly

Mosquitoes carry malaria. Fish eat mosquito eggs. No more malaria.

Changes color when in contact with chemical found in most mines

9-month-olds can learn foreign languages, but not from DVDs or tapes. What language does your day-care provider speak?

Summit scheduled for midweek to discuss solutions

Already has downed 2 million chickens, and if it combines with another virus it could kill large numbers of people

It could recombine with a human flu virus and spread everywhere

They're not just for moles anymore

And those onions you put on your sardine sandwich, too

Claiming they just want Israel to give up theirs. Whatever.

Italian prime minister says the plot fell through, but it would have invited a holy war of uber-Biblical proportions

Come for the nuclear weapons, stay for the hospitality

Islamic extremists want to rule the world

Italian anarchists suspected

The war continues

Could anything, short of her using her children in the attack, be more disgusting?

Responses to future terrorist attacks likely to erode civil liberties, so caution is needed; let's not forget the protections of an angry, educated populace as well

Says it's time to fight together against those spewing anti-Western hate, or pack up and go home

Next: New Yorkers to call Texans "cosmopolitan"

Then again, media moguls usually contribute to lots of campaigns, hoping to buy closer access

That weird tirade on Iowa caucus night was a little too weird